Breakfast talk, San Cugat, 20/11/2011 (after very many comments about the performance and evening)
Q: could you say something about dinner?
A: good crèpe
Q: yes, but about what happened at dinner
A : really good crèpe, [but what is the question]?
Q: this situation which often happens at meals, silence, seemed to be here last night but at a 20 fold force compared to what we are used to. at least for my part I very much found it difficult to hold on, as if completely before the unknown.
When we are here, in the course of a week, we are in front of our entire lives. For each one of us our entire life is represented, from the moment of birth, to death, in the course of a week. During this time a creative impulse is present and as we near the end of the course, things intensify.
A course is real; a performance is real and a real presence makes itself known to us [through silence, amongst other ways].
The silence that comes during meals is palpable, and we can feel the presence of this “something” which was intensified last night and which was also present during the performance.
This is a creative force that so wants to give itself away that it comes and bites us on the arse; the most unlikely characters, a mixed up group of people from different countries, who can’t play for shit, and yet, the music was there, the moment they entered the room (… especially at this moment, the presence of the walking in… the highpoint of the evening).
This creative impulse comes from the unconditioned world; but we perceive it in the silence that music makes apparent. [music is the framework that shows the entry into our world of the unconditioned world, through music our (conditioned) world comes into contact with the unconditioned world].
There is nothing mysterious in the idea of the conditional world. Conditional is, for example, where you were born and to which parents; I may have been born in England to certain parents. This is the conditional world, this is also known as “fate”.
The unconditioned world is not apparent in any rational sense. [If you were to argue with someone about it you would not reach a conclusion, other than disaccord.]
The relationship between the conditional and unconditioned, as described in hundreds upon hundreds of theological tomes, is commonly referred to as “faith”
Yet here we have the possibility of experiencing this directly. We thus have moments when the unconditionend world makes itself felt and is present to us, as often at meals, and in particular last night. Or in performance [for the presence of silence is illuminated by a performance.]
The unconditioned world is all around us, but it manifests at a higher frequency than that which our usual perceptual aparatus (points to head) can operate. However this vibration can be registered here (points to heart), [hear with heart, heart with ears.]
Fate is of the conditional world. Where you are born, this is your fate. These are the limitations placed on a situation, a life.
The world is changing. Old structures are crumbling. Things have been accelerating for a long time
What is now happening is that the acceleration of change is itself accelerating at an incomprehensible rate : it is such that it is absolutely not possible for any human being to understand the true situation of the world. Even if Einstein were here he’d not understand it.
[A reasonable person would despair], but Hope is not reasonable, and Love is stronger still.
So, we have a guitar course, and it is our life, for each of us, in miniature. This is very clear to anyone who has reached middle age [connecting to the middle of the course].
Our world is off course; adulthood must be about beginning to take some responsibility for how the world is going and taking up some part in its direction.
Everyone has a task to discharge and if this is done successfully during the middle of life, then something else becomes available at the end; similarly this is possible on a course. This work for each person is associated with his or her destiny, as opposed to fate.
Fate = conditional ; Destiny = unconditioned, created / creative.
The possibility of Destiny acting upon Fate [the zone of interaction between destiny and fate ?] is Grace.
What is the orchestra?
It is a microcosm of the universe; utterly incredible to sit listening to this structure presenting the condensed history of the universe in one hour.
What are we doing in the orchestra?
What is needed in the new world? A network of people, going out into the world each bringing his or her unique contribution [destiny] [and so by realizing the greater destiny of the community/nation/ planet].
Able to work together [in the face of incomprehensible change, [unmanageable variety] when it’s necessary].
What are we doing in the orchestra?
We are practising for this situation.
The orchestra fits into the great transition that is at hand and it will last 200 years, or rather it needs too.
Why 200 years? Because if it can’t be done by then it won’t matter.
[Something was present and available at last night’s meal and performance].
A performance is real, and a performance where an intro team performance is available to music immediately, upon entering the space, is something quite incredible.
It has taken 26 years to get here, from the moment after the first inaugural meeting when we strapped on guitars.
Reality, it’s closer than the air we breath… so may we bring part of our attention to the intake of breath.
If you knew with certainty that you would be dead in 3 days, would this change your behaviour? or would you instead … break out the whiskey and cigars?
“Make mine a champagne.”
Sherbourne house: One of the stately homes of England which had not been stately for quite some time.
If you have seen the film “IF”, well this was based on a true story that happened in Sherbourne house.
Dropped off there in 1975 by my mother and dear Auntie Edie, who were both aghast at the austerity of the accommodation (we might not be so, now, after these years of GC houses, but they were).
The sparsely furnished room with the iron beds, etc. I was there alone, a day early.
And there I had a most terrifying dream. I don’t know whether it was to be taken literally as premonition or as metaphor, and have spoken of it rarely since.
[End of talk]